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my thoughts

I can't believe that what I feel is really happening to me
Make it hurt
And point the finger at my insecurities
Well I guess I just don't understand about those complexities in your mind
And I guess I just don't understand why this world seems so unkind
Maybe just once I get what's coming to me.

**"Maybe Just Once" - Nine Inch Nails**

Thursday, June 30, 2005

Out with the old, in with the new. That saying can be so harsh. Maybe sometimes you don't quite want to get rid of the old but instead you just want to experience some new things. Beginnings are always interesting. You never know quite what to expect so everything is novel and exciting. So why is it that while you are having fun with new things you find yourself thinking of the old things? You can't keep all your stuff packed away in a box with mothballs. You might forget all about it and when you go searching again, you find that it's no longer the same as it was when you left it. It's changed over time.

I can't say if I've made the right choice. I don't know if I'll ever be able to say that. I chose what I chose and now I've got to stick to it. It's new and fun and it makes me happy. I don't keep my old stuff packed up in boxes though. I keep it around. I like to look at it and touch it every so often. It makes me feel safe and good inside. Unfortunately, this time the old thing has gone and packed itself in a box and taped it shut so that I can't see inside. I have the knife to cut the tape but was told it would be easier if the box was never opened from the outside. Some day, I hope the box opens from the inside. I'll be waiting with a smile.

Two weeks away and I will be obtaining a kitty! Only for a little while though. The slut is going camping for a week and, instead of leaving the kitty in an empty house for that long, I offered to kitty-sit her. It should be interesting. She might decide that she hates me as soon as she sets foot in my house. I'm counting on the fact that she knows me (and doesn't seem to loathe me yet) and will perhaps not claw my eyes out. I was told she hates new places but I will spoil her and give her love and maybe she won't want to leave. Yeah right... Scooter, I luv you and I hope you won't mind me taking a zillion more pictures of you. I've only taken a few and you'll be getting a bunch more. I look forward to your tiny fluffiness!

*stupid link of the day* Amazing Ben: it seems that this guy thinks he has a stupid website. it's up to you to decide.
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