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my thoughts

I can't believe that what I feel is really happening to me
Make it hurt
And point the finger at my insecurities
Well I guess I just don't understand about those complexities in your mind
And I guess I just don't understand why this world seems so unkind
Maybe just once I get what's coming to me.

**"Maybe Just Once" - Nine Inch Nails**

Tuesday, May 04, 2004

Will, me & mr Ryanme & Kat when she came to visit me in Waterloo
my Southwood grrlz: Liane, Kristal, me, Kim, Nicole & Stephme & Sammi
New Year's 2004 with Aleem, Josh, me & AidanMailiis *drinking* at her 19th b-day party

Quiz stolen from Ryan and Will:
g e n e r a l
1. name: JeN
2. single or taken: I've sworn off dating so, single
3. gender: female
4. birthday: April 27th, 1983
6. siblings: one younger brother
7. hair color: natural = dark brown (almost black), current = slightly lighter brown with blonde streaks and bright purple bangs
8. eye color: brown
9. shoe size: women's 5-7
10. height: 5'3"
r e l a t i o n s h i p s
1. who are your best friends?: Leya, and anyone else I hang out with on a regular basis (you know who you are)
2. do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?: see question #2 from the 'general' section
f a s h i o n s t u f f
1. where is your favorite place to shop: Peach Berserk even though I can't afford anything
s p e c i f i c s
1. do you do drugs?: no, not even Tylenol
2. what kind of shampoo do you use?: Dove, Herbal Essences, Pantene Pro-V (pretty much anything that smells good)
3. what are you most scared of?: failure, loneliness, mass amounts of pain
4. who is the last person that called you?: some guy named Alan who wanted... who knows what? Probably to sell something
5. Where do you want to get married?: in a green field
6. what would you change about yourself?: way too many things to list
f a v o u r i t e s
1. color: fire engine red
2. food: cheesecake
3. boys' names: Thelon, Scott, Brent, Brett... I'm sure there's others I like but I just can't think of 'em at the moment
4. girls' names: Jayde, Arista, Raven, Ariel, Angelina (yes, I'm biased)... there's more
5. subjects in school: nothing beats OAC sociology with Ms. Wood
6. animals: dogs, cows, penguins, flamingos
7. sports: hockey, baseball, soccer
h a v e y o u e v e r
1. given anyone a bath?: my dog
2. smoked?: no
3. bungee jumped?: no
4. made yourself throw up?: no, in fact I try to avoid ever doing it
5. skinny dipped?: yup
6: ever been in love?: yes
7. made yourself cry to get out of trouble?: yup
8. pictured your crush naked?: duh!
9. actually seen your crush naked?: yup
10. cried when someone died?: yup
11. lied: yup
12. fallen for your best friend?: I wish
13. been rejected?: well, I've never asked anyone out so, no for dating, but in other situations, yup
14. rejected someone?: yup
15. used someone?: yup
16. done something you regret?: good grief YES
c u r r e n t
clothes: jeans, a sweatshirt with a blue t-shirt under it (I'm freezing), undergarments and my Tuesday socks
music: none
make-up: none
annoyance: many things, like me coming online with the hopes that someone would be online and them not being there
smell: the food my brother just took out of the microwave
desktop picture: a group of the Ranma 1/2 characters
book you're reading: "Good Omens" by Terry Pratchett & Neil Gaiman
in cd player: "Time Capsule" by the B-52's
in dvd player: nothing
color of toenails: no nail polish on... maybe hot pink soon?
l a s t p e r s o n
you touched: Lauren
hugged: Leya
you imed: Rob
you yelled at: my dad
you kissed: Leya
a r e y o u
understanding: I try
open-minded: I try
arrogant: I can be
insecure: all the time
interesting: I don't think so but others find me entertaining
random: yeah, with a lot of sugar in me
hungry: no, I have no appetite anymore. I think it's from being depressed
smart: in school, no
moody: I'm depressed so, yes
hard working: no
organized: no way!
shy: sometimes
difficult: I am female, yes
attractive: I don't think so, others say I'm wrong
bored easily: no, I am easily amused (especially by the sparkly floors at Laurier!)
messy: yes
obsessed: with Angelina, yes
r a n d o m
In the morning i am: not a happy person, especially at an early hour
all i need is: a job?
love is: blissful torture
i dream about: things I wish would come true but won't
o p p o s i t e s e x
what do you notice first: hair, then shoes, then clothes, then face
last person you slow danced with: pretend slow dance to a fast song = drunky mcdrunkster Sunday night at Joe
worst question to ask: when little kids ask "why?" after everything you say. I usually say "Z" when I get fed up (ha ha)
who makes you laugh the most?: the bunny
who makes you smile: the people I love : )
who do you have a crush on: the person I have a crush on
who has a crush on you: the person who has a crush on me?
d o y o u e v e r
sit on the internet all night waiting for that someone special to im you?: I have indeed
wish you were a member of the opposite sex?: sometimes
wish you were younger: I wish I was 4 years old again
cried because someone said something about you?: yes
n u m b e r
of times i have had my heart broken: one, two will come along eventually...
of hearts i have broken: as far as I know, zero
of girls ive kissed: four
of continents i have lived in: one
of tight friends: a handful (exact number unknown)
of cds i own: damn, I have them all written down too, well over one hundred
of scars on my body: infinite cuz I always injure myself
f i n a l q u e s t i o n s
do you like fillings these out?: sometimes, when I'm bored, like now and also since I have realized that the person I wanted to talk to isn't coming online (bitch...)
gold or silver: silver
what was the last film you saw at the movies?: Kill Bill Vol. 2
favorite cartoon/anime?: Ranma 1/2
what did you have for breakfast this morning?: Oatmeal Crisp Almond Crunch
who would you love being locked in a room with?: either Angelina Jolie (for purely sexual reasons), Leya or my crush
could you live without your computer?: I think I could, but I would be missing many things
would you color your hair? did you not read what my current hair colour is?
could you ever get off the computer?: yup, when I'm done filling this thing out
habla espanol? no... por favor?
how many people are on your buddy list?: 52
drink alcohol? yup

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