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my thoughts

I can't believe that what I feel is really happening to me
Make it hurt
And point the finger at my insecurities
Well I guess I just don't understand about those complexities in your mind
And I guess I just don't understand why this world seems so unkind
Maybe just once I get what's coming to me.

**"Maybe Just Once" - Nine Inch Nails**

Tuesday, June 17, 2003

I went to see fireworks down by the lake on Sunday. Kevin was there. Talk about an awkward moment. Lauren even noticed (how could she not?). It was easier just to ignore him for the rest of the night, which I did. Man, I hope he doesn't start whining to Leya about how I ignored him. I also saw Sean at the Raven & Firkin Saturday night. Luck was on my side for he didn't try to talk to me the entire night. I think he finally got the point. Hallellujah! My jaw hurts cuz I had a dentist appointment this afternoon and my dentist likes to stretch your mouth open as wide as possible. Quite painful once the check-up and whatnot is over. He also told me I'll have to get my wisdom teeth out. Oh no! Haven't I had enough operations done on my mouth? I think so. Three is plenty so there is no need for one more. Anyway, I'm sad so I think I'll post some song lyrics. Maybe it'll take my mind off of evil stick figures who have no soul.

Pink - "Hell Wit Ya"

What is this
I heard you got a new miss
We just broke up so you know that I'm pissed
They say you're faithful I don't believe that shhhh...
Oh no, oh no

[Bridge:]
Oh I tried to act like I didn't care
But it doesn't seem fair you're so good to her
And I tried to pretend I didn't see all those things that you do, you couldn't do for me

[Chorus:]
I was in love wit ya
But the hell wit ya cuz you didn't wanna treat me right
I was in love wit ya
But the hell wit ya cuz you didn't wanna treat me right
Now ya got another girl in your life, givin her love all day and night
I was in love wit ya
But the hell wit ya cuz you didn't wanna treat me right

So I hear, I've met the wench before
(yeah I remember that time we went to Pizza Hut and you told me she was your cousin)
I hear you learned to open doors
(so when did you become such a damn gentleman)

[Repeat Bridge]

[Repeat Chorus]

What does she do to you
To make you give her everything like you never did for me
Call it jealousy, but it's killin me
Cuz all the time that you were mine, you didn't treat me right
No no, no you didn't treat me right, no no no

[Repeat Chorus]


Kim Stockwood - "Jerk"

Since you've been gone I feel so much better
Cause I saw how mean you could be
I used to want some explanation
Now all I want is my Patsy Cline CD

How I've waited for today
When I could finally say

You jerk
You jerk
You are such a jerk
There are other words
But they just don't work

Sometimes I wish I'd mailed you that letter
That said the things I dare not say
Instead I set the thing on fire
I had to say this outloud anyway

I'm so glad I found the nerve
To say what you deserve

You jerk
You jerk
You are such a jerk
There are other words
But they just don't work

They try to be so cool
Insult you like a fool
Never take your call when you're nobody at all
Until you're somebody and then they want to be your friend
How come jerks don't know they're jerks
(I don't know)

So next time someone makes you feel little
Just sing this song inside your head
And like a great big cartoon bubble
These lovely words will dance above their head

How I've waited for today
When I could finally say

You jerk
You jerk
You are such a jerk
There are other words
But they just don't work

You jerk
You jerk
You are such a jerk
There are other words
But they just don't work


Alanis Morissette - "Not The Doctor"

I don't want to be the filler if the void is solely yours
I don't want to be your glass of single malt whiskey
Hidden in the bottom drawer
I don't want to be a bandage if the wound is not mine
Lend me some fresh air
I don't want to be adored for what I merely represent to you
I don't want to be your babysitter
You're a very big boy now
I don't want to be your mother
I didn't carry you in my womb for nine months
Show me the back door

CHORUS:
Visiting hours are 9 to 5 and if I show up at 10 past 6
Well I already know that you'd find some way to sneak me in and oh
Mind the empty bottle with the holes along the bottom
You see it's too much to ask for and I am not the doctor

I don't want to be the sweeper of the eggshells that you walk upon
I don't want to be your other half I believe that 1 and 1 make 2
I don't want to be your food or the light from the fridge
on your face at midnight
Hey what are you hungry for
I don't want to be the glue that holds your pieces together
I don't want to be your idol
See this pedestal is high and I'm afraid of heights
I don't want to be lived through
A vicarious occasion
Please open the window

REPEAT CHORUS

I don't want to live on someday when my motto is last week
I don't want to be responsible for your fractured hear
and its wounded beat
I don't want to be a substitute for the smoke you've been inhaling
What do you thank me
What do you thank me for

REPEAT CHORUS
JeN's mind ejaculated @ 4:24 PM | | permalink
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